Nothing quite like hunting for Easter Eggs when your ADD medicine hasn’t kicked in yet.

It was a difficult day for me today. I had to go socialize with the neighborhood at the Easter Egg hunt and my ADD medicine hadn’t quite kicked in yet. I was behind my eyes for nearly the entire time, until about the last 20 minutes. Had a great conversation with the older guy who lives across the street during that time, though.

I’ve always tried to maintain the difference between loneliness and aloneness, but it’s a fine line, and one can quickly turn into the other before you realize it. I was able to spend some time with one of my friends on my fl, which was …well it was really nice. He’s been a semi-love interest in the past, but he’s not one I can easily trust so it makes things difficult. I’m not really a jerk at heart, so while I don’t feel like I’m using him, I might be. He’s a romantic, so I can hold him and be vulnerable and it’s ok – which is more than I can say for the last several online boyfriends I’ve had (online addicts tend to go through them rather quickly).

I asked my mate, who I met years ago in addictive online circumstances, if they would create someone for me. While it might have been the obvious thing to do for some people, the division between in head living, and out head living sometimes doesn’t cross over. I’ve got high hopes for it, even though it might mean that I have to create another online account and return back to the addictive environment I left. The best luck I’ve had in leaving was when I was able to bring the fantasy into the real life. It’s worked very well in the past, and I’ll keep my fingers crossed that it works this time.


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